This last fall, my parents wanted to update the family photo that hangs on their wall above the fireplace as there were five new members since the last one was taken.
My sister arranged the photographer, we all agonized over what to wear and on a beautiful evening in October, we met down at the river in Fish Creek Park at golden hour. My kids are actually getting old enough now that family photo sessions aren’t quite as painful as they have been in the past; however, by the end of the night one thing was for sure – they were starving! I mean nothing works up an appetite like standing and smiling for an hour.
My husband suggested that we go out for dinner at the nearby Asian Buffet and before I knew it, we were elbows deep in springs rolls and ginger beef. By the time everyone was on their second plate, I looked around the table and all I could see was a lot of beige – from the chow mein to the chicken fried rice to the dumplings…there was a serious lack of vegetables on their plates.
The mom in me, somewhat rhetorically asked, “has anyone had anything green to eat tonight?” to which my oldest daughter replied,
“I had green Jello!”
That’s not exactly what I had in mind.
We all laughed, and I will admit even I tried the green Jello…it was exceptionally jiggly! The restaurant did not offer a smorgasbord of fresh fruit and vegetables, so we all filled up on what was in front of us. After the last fortune cookie was cracked open and read, we left that night with that ‘I ate too much food, I’m so full!’ feeling you get after Thanksgiving dinner.
We were full, but were we nourished?
This experience reminded me of a story told by Stephen W. Owen in General Conference. He said, “Years ago, President Boyd K. Packer told of a herd of deer that, because of heavy snowfall, was trapped outside its natural habitat and faced possible starvation. Some well-meaning people, in an effort to save the deer, dumped truckloads of hay around the area – it wasn’t what deer would normally eat, but they hoped it would at least get the deer through the winter. Sadly, most of the deer were later found dead. They had eaten the hay, but it did not nourish them, and they starved to death with their stomachs full.”
How many times is this true of my own spiritual nourishment? My soul is hungry and all I do is fill it with a large plate of Chinese food.
How often do I feel spiritually empty and starved even though my day was full?
How often does my life feel like an Asian buffet – overwhelmed trying to consume the endless array of beige dishes the world offers that leave me fed and full but spiritually malnourished.
Let me illustrate this with a personal example. I have recently discovered the feature in the settings for both Facebook and Instagram that show you how much time you have spent on that app each day for an entire week. Yikes! This was a very alarming revelation for me. I often lament about not having enough time in the day, yet waste hours of my life mindlessly scrolling on social media. It fills my time but leaves me completely empty.
So how do we nourish our souls? How do we find the green in a world of beige? How do we fill our hearts, minds and souls with the things of lasting eternal significance?
I’m sure this looks different for everyone, but I truly feel there is great value in the timeless idiom, “first things first!”
A parent tells their child they can only have ice cream once they have finished their dinner first. They can play with friends once their homework is done first. They must finish their chores first and then they can watch TV.
Yet the child claims they are full of dinner but still wants dessert. They may lie about completing their homework and hurriedly run outside to play. Or they hastily half finish their chores in order to spend their time watching TV or playing video games.
Are we the child or the parent?
The principle seems so simple, yet how often do I lazily scroll on my phone instead of reading my scriptures first. Do I go about my day checking off my to do list without first asking God what he would have me do? Do I worry and complain about situations in my life when I took no thought to pray about it first?
Am I the child or am I the parent?
Honestly, I am both.
The parent in the sense that I know what I need to do. I know what will nourish my soul and I know that I need something green on my plate.
The child in the sense that I am still learning, making mistakes and in need of constant, yet loving reminders to put first things first, to get off my phone, to say a prayer, to stop filling my soul with chow mein and eat something green.
I was taught this principle through an answer to prayer I had a year or so ago. I was particularly angry with my kids one morning (probably because they were being particularly annoying) and I let my temper get the better of me. After unnecessarily yelling at my children, my husband pointed out that maybe I need to take an anger management course…insert eye roll here please. I did not feel good about the way I had treated my kids, but I was pretty sure there were some intervention steps I could take prior to anger management classes.
Later that day as I was driving, I said a sincere prayer to Heavenly Father – asking for forgiveness as well as for help. The answer came so clear, almost audibly to my mind,
“You are the life force of your family.”
I instantly pictured a watering hole in the middle of the desert. The animals come from miles away to drink of the life-giving waters the reservoir provides. They have no other options. I thought of myself as my family’s watering hole, their life force. What kind of water do you want to give to your family I thought. Cloudy and muddy – contaminated with anger and contention. Or crystal-clear water – the kind that will heal and nourish. The living waters Jesus spoke of at the well.
So, what happens if we’ve already filled up on a feast of beige or drank from murky waters? Thankfully our prophet has lovingly invited us to discover the joy of daily repentance and taught that it is the key to progress and keeps us moving forward on the covenant path.
It’s also so important to remember the “small and simple means” aspect of the gospel. Sometimes our spiritual nourishment comes one sip of water or one bite of broccoli at a time.
It is like the ever-green mountain range in Northwestern Israel spoken of by Amy Wright. Mount Carmel stays green all year round owing primarily to tiny amounts of dew. Nourishment happens daily. She said, “Like the dews of Carmel, as we seek to nourish our souls with things pertaining to righteousness, small and simple things, our testimonies and the testimonies of our children will live.”
So even though there are a lot of beige foods in this world that I really love (and I don’t just mean that figuratively), I am committing myself to making a more concentrated effort to nourish my soul and the precious souls of my children by putting first things first and remembering to ask myself on days when I am spiritually starved,
“Have you had anything green today?”
Find Joy in the Ordinary 